Gem’s NFL (No Freakin Lockout) Week 2 Recap

September 23, 2011

This could be Vick's real punishment for his previous transgressions...

Wow–another week of mayhem and [ego] murder!! In addition to bringing you my account on the week’s highlights, I’m also going to showcase a new segment here on the blog called “The Fan Fare”.  I find that things that happen OFF the gridiron can be just as riveting as what happens on it. The fantasy leagues, the pick em pools, the news, the gossip, the trash talking, the tweets—they all enhance my viewing pleasure. So I asked a few other fans what they like most about football besides the game itself. Enjoy!

The Recap:

  • HOLD. THE. PHONE. The DEEtroit not-so-cowardly Lions, Buffalo Wild Wings Bills, and the Washington Injuns Redskins are all 2-0!!!! (O_O) It’s a new day, people. Obama had it right when he coined the phrase, “the audacity of hope”.
  • Yall know the Bills are my adopted sports kids, right?
  • Down 18pts at the half and what does that Harvard grad Fitzpatrick do? Leads the Bills to score 5 consecutive TDs on all 5 2nd-half possessions! That’s what you call WERK!!! #IvyLeagueSwag
  • Then you have the teams that are 0-2… *sigh* I’m so heartbroken to see Indy in that group, thanks to that geriatric a$s clown Kerry Collins!!! *weeps*
  • P.S. Isn’t it ironic that my boo Peyton has the nickname “Fetus Face” by my labmates (since last season) and received stem cell treatment last week? I feel bad that it makes me guffaw.
  • The only losing team people really care about are the Carolina Panthers. Why? Because Cam Newton happened. TWICE. Four hundred and thirty two yards in his 2nd pro game—this kid just might be a real QB. But Carolina’s gonna need some semblance of a running game to actually WIN games. #whenpassingCLEARLYisntenough
  • Most un-noteworthy in loserville are the Dolphins, clearly MIA—missing in achievement. But how can they get direction (towards a W) when their coach says sh*t like, “It’s baffling… I don’t have any answers for it,” about their losses?? (-_-) WTF?? Sorry Miami, it’s not looking good for you guys.
  • Another WTF moment came when Donovan McNabb said there was “no need to panic” that his team was 0-2. Oh really?? Well seeing as how his losses match the number of teams who kicked him to the curb, he probably finds comfort in the symmetry. #balance
  • I wonder if McNabb smirked to himself watching Vick get smashed into his teammate while the Eagles slowly got picked apart by the Dirty Birds.
  • I think Vick will always be his own worst enemy—he is bound to kill himself while giving his all in a game on any given Sunday. What should be the over/under for when this takes place?
    • Boomer—“It was good for Vick and the Eagles, it was bad for Vick and the Eagles, it was UGLY for Vick and the Eagles.”
    • @ethiopianboy: but who really thought Vick would make it through a whole season?
  • By the way, can we give it up for Latinos doin BIG THINGS all around the league? We reppin!! Falcons’ TE Tony Gonzalez now fifth on the NFL’s career receiving list! #Orale
  • Sidenote: Is it just me or is it apropos that Arizona has no Latino players (that I know of)?
  • But back to beloved Latinos, Nacho is actually playing better than mediocre. Did you know he has more TDs than INTs so far this season? I know, I can hardly believe it either. #KudosSenor
  • Meanwhile, Jet’s Antonio “the jokes about me write themselves” Cromartie thinks he’s asuperior player to the [now] Eagles CB Nnamdi Asomugha. (o_O) Is that why the Jets only re-signed you after Nnamdi said NO? Sir, please have a seat onRevisIsland. And while you’re there, learn how to tighten up on your coverage.
  • In other news , the Seahawks soared about as high as a wing-clipped chicken against the Steelers. But what better way for the Steelers to bounce back from an a$s pounding (by another bird crew) than with a shut out? Never mind that it was an NFC West team. Minor details.
  • While we’re on the subject of abysmal west coast divisions, can some one please explain to me how my boy Rivers threw a pick to NE DT Wilfork’s plump a$s (who ran for a good 20 yds)????? Cmon son[Diego]!! #dobetter
  • I’m going to pretend that SD turnover (on the 1 yd line!!!!!!) that lead to a 99 yd drive and TD did NOT happen. #erasedfrommemory
  • I did find it endearing, however, that Tom Brady has a sense of humor. Not only did he tells fans to get “lubed up” for the game (#twss?), but he also made a brave move by basically telling ex-player Tedy Bruschi (recall last week’s comment) to STFU. Maybe Tom’s human afterall…

The Fan Fare:

Ed said (hehe, that rhymes): The Pregame Ritual. In life, everyone has something they have to do to get ready to perform. You might need a quiet moment, pray, call your mama, or even do a little dance. Its what gets you in your mode. In football, there are similar rituals that players do to get themselves ready to compete. It might be Drew Brees getting the teamed pumped up, it might be Brian Dawkins giving an intense speech to the defense, or it might be Ray Lewis doing a shimmy, a two-step, a scream, and a pelvic thrust coming out of the tunnel. These rituals give me goosebumps and get me LIVE when I watch it, so I know that football players want to run through walls going through them. That’s whats I love about football, its what makes the “experience” so surreal.

Tanya said: Hmm..besides the NFL nap? I love the tradition of it. Sundays 1,4 and 830. The meetups, the wings, the trashtalk, the camaraderie, the rivalries… I also extra love twitter + NFL. I made twitter jail for the 1st time ever. Lol.

And there you have it. Did I miss anything good in my recap? Were there any other noteworthy game or player highlights that I forgot to mention? Is it possible for the Bills to have a winning season? Will Vick be as good as new come this Sunday? Are Cam Newton’s teeth to big for his head? Hmmmmm…

Lovin this game,

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  • Reply MadScientist7 September 23, 2011 at 2:57 pm

    the redskins (1st place nfc east), bills and lions are doing big things. i’m happy that the redskins are actually winning (for now). after the media ripped rex grossman for saying the redskins could win the nfc east. that just goes to show you these so called experts don’t always know what they’re talking about. same “experts” who said that cam wasn’t an nfl ready qb.

    oh yeah before i go i hope romo plays on monday. felix jones too. i don’t want any excuses. i’ve grown tired hearing about romo’s ribs and lungs.

    • Reply gemmieboo September 23, 2011 at 3:12 pm

      yeah, i think Sexy Rexy just needed to be given a chance. im glad he’s proved ppl wrong (so far, anyway). i love a good “now what, beyotch” story.

      im very interested to see how the cowboys and indians (ha!) game plays out. MNF will be a tribute to an age-old opposition. down with the guerros!!

  • Reply panamaenrique September 23, 2011 at 3:01 pm

    FOOTBALL. I never liked McNabb. He was always too passive. And I have always felt he was too tenuous about running outside of the pocket even if would be advantageous because he didn’t want to be considered a ‘Black Quarterback’. On your Latino players vein, Tony Romo is no longer Tony Romo: He is Antonio Ramiro from here on out.

    • Reply gemmieboo September 23, 2011 at 3:16 pm

      mcnabb is on some other ish. i dont get him. at all.

      i am going to have to veto calling tony romo anything spanish sounding. hes too much of a white boy. i like his latino heritage to be some what uncertain–kinda like his QB abilities.

  • Reply keisha brown September 23, 2011 at 3:17 pm

    1. me no likey this picture… 🙁
    2. DJ (that’s my DJ) may be a coon..but no one..not NO ONE can tell me that his hustle to save the td (that yes..eventually happened) wasn’t the epitome of hustle. #norickyross
    3. teddy ruxpin needs to have a multitude of seats. there are empty olympic stadiums in china with them.
    4. i love that ed broke down each aspect of ray oh shuguh lewis’s um.. dance.
    5. i need to figure out a way to capture drew brees’ pregame huddle so that can wake my a** up in the mornings.

    that is all.
    the hi-c

    • Reply gemmieboo September 24, 2011 at 6:30 pm

      1. sorry–had to.
      2. DJ hustles hard cuz forfeited TDs dont get wins on the score board. or something like that.
      3. lmbo @ teddy ruxpin. why? rude.
      4. lol ed’s answer made me smile so bright when i read it. its so ed.
      5. word. #gogetem

  • Reply miss t-lee September 23, 2011 at 3:27 pm

    The fact that you hashtagged “Orale” has kilt me!! oh yeah the Texans (or North Mexicans as you like to call us…lol) are also 2-0. 🙂

    • Reply gemmieboo September 24, 2011 at 6:32 pm

      LOL i had to. me, my mom, and my bro all say “orale” to anything good goin on, esp in the mexican/latino community lol.

      yes, the houston north mexicans (or “texans” if you will lol) are 2-0 but thats not really surprising. the ones mentioned are SHOCKING really lol.

  • Reply Wu Young, Agent of M.E. September 23, 2011 at 7:46 pm

    I saw a total of 40 minutes of football last weekend. I watched 10 minutes of SC/Navy and I tried (Lawd, knows I tried) to watch the Falcons and Eagles.

    -Desean Jackson is awesome. (Not fast but sudden!) I’d love to have him on my squad. I would then have a dude on the roster to punch him in the mouth just to keep his head on straight.

    -Latino QB alert- South Carolina QB Stephen “I’m Cuban B” Garcia is serviceable enough to be an NFL back up… He is also a “dude” in the “I’m gonna keep on living brother!” Kind of way.

    -Due to geography I was forced to listen to the Panthers game on the way back from Charlotte. They are giving came every opportunity to play in a spread/four-wide offense like college and hell if it’s not working. The more games he plays the more tape the competition has on him. This could get interesting.

    -I hope the Eagles’ right tackle rents and not owns. *sidenote* There are too many shitty offensive linemen in the league. They play defense like the French army.

    -The Raiders are going to fuck around and give me hope. They could win that cesspool also known as the AFC West.

    Regional coverage is killing me.

    • Reply gemmieboo September 24, 2011 at 6:38 pm

      why for come you only saw 40min of fball?? thats just…. unfortunate.

      DJ is on one of my fantasy squads. and i heart his hustle. and the points he brings me.

      ima keep my eye out for Garcia. altho Cubans are a diff latino beast, if you will.

      im def interested to see how Cam does the rest of the season and how his opponents prepare to try and stop him. if he takes the time to become as cerebral as he is physical, he’ll be good.

      LMBO @ “rents and not owns”. for. real. OLs nation wide are on some “out to lunch” type ish.

      i have no love for the raiders (despite them having a black coach AND qb). we will always be rivals and i will always have hate for them as a result. i wont wish your team g’luck. *spits* so yeah.

  • Reply I Am Your People September 24, 2011 at 1:56 am

    T.O. (remember him? the guy with the reality show? No? Anyway…) is also getting stem cell therapy on his knee. Which will help him, on next season of Single Ladies. I guess.

    • Reply gemmieboo September 24, 2011 at 6:39 pm

      LMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you right doe.

  • Reply That Damn African September 24, 2011 at 8:57 am

    *waves the “My Team is 2-0” flag* Gotta be proud while I still have the chance cause you never know with the Skins lol.

    That Bills comeback was something else. They’ve looked good before and sh*tted the bed by the end of the season so we’ll see how far they go.

    Vick’s style of play, as well as Andy Reid’s reluctance to call the run, will continue to put him in situations where he’s vulnerable. The Eagles have been pretty good at countering teams’ pass rush with their incredible speed though.

    That Wilfork interception return was too funny though lol.

    I take a bit of pleasure in seeing McNabb start 0-2. There’s still plenty of season left so I won’t claim that the Vikes are done, but McNabb is nothing more than mediocre at this point in his career.

    • Reply gemmieboo September 24, 2011 at 6:43 pm

      why you gotta wave your teams success in my face, doe?? pssshht

      the Bills are going to get at least 6 wins, i guarantee this and hope they dont make a liar out of me

      ive got my eye on the Eagles. and Vick. mostly because thats all my mom ever talks about (she loves Vick undeniably). but also because i want to know if they’ll amount to anything this year.

      that Wilfork int was NOT funny. it was HILARIOUS! lol & smh

      McNabb’s reluctance to accept his mediocreness and keep his mouth shut is the only thing keeping him relevant and somewhat interesting at this point. no below average pro qb should get as much attn as he does.

  • Reply Wu Young, Agent of M.E. September 24, 2011 at 8:10 pm

    I only saw 40 minutes because I went to Charlotte last Saturday to the Rock The Bells tour. Before that I spent Saturday morning replacing the brakes and rotors on the ride. So after the drinking and driving from Chucktown to Charlotte (I abhor driving.) I just went to sleep.

    I didn’t expect you to wave as the pirate ship passed. We both know what Norval Turner’s coaching style is like.

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